feeling absurdokay , failure is the road to success . Everybody knows the meaning but you will never really get the feeling of pain when you're not experiencing falling or failure . I am actually a dumb-ass . Seriously , I don't even know what my ambition is , what's my aim for life and what I wanna be in the future . Despite of my always-doesn't-care-about-what-happen-in-the-environment attitude , I have never appreciate what my family did for me .
The reason why I chose biotech lies on my stupidity of pushing my ability to hide my bad reputation in the past . What I've done in the past had broke my family's desires into millions of pieces . I was a bull-headed . I ruined my parent's hope . That is why , I decided to start a new leaf by changing my attitude . From a not-so-obedient-child to a very-obedient-yet-trying-to-fit-in-situation-child . I wanted to be something and someone they could proud of , I wanted to be somebody out of their expectation , I did my best but all I ever gave is disappointment .
I admit that I am not intelligent type nor smart , I was just trying hard to fit in . I did burnt the midnight oil but everything turns out the way I never expected . I keep failing , and I keep on falling . I tried hard and harder , I'm really bushed but I can't make heads or tails of something . I haven't got a clue . I found everything confusing and illogical . The least I can do now is just trying , even though I know it is the hardest thing to do .
I feel kind of down in the dumps .I have no one to talk to , I have nobody to cry with , I have no shoulders to cry on (I have my own shoulders though) .
Dear GOD , I understand I have always forgot to thank you for those good days I'm having , but for now that I start failing and falling hard to the greatest depths of failure , I'm asking you to give me a chance to stand up straight and give me the strength to get back on my knee .
#always laugh when you can , it is the cheapest medicine :)
